We’re all puzzles in regards to Dating and Relationships

Posted: January 30, 2017 by Nell in Advice, Dating, Lifestyle, Self Help/ Motivation
Tags: , , , ,


I’m a firm believer in kids under the age of 5  being the most pure and genuine people on earth. Kids in that age range tend to live free. They say what’s on their mind without thinking twice about the things they say, until they’re corrected. They tend to love everyone, until they’re told not to. They generally don’t fear ordinary human beings, unless they’re harmed by one or taught to. They see no major difference in other human beings, and usually accept their peers for however they’re presented. Kids have a great way of being loyal and lovable. I’m not sure if their love is unconditional, but its close to it, if not.

I believe when you’re a child, you’re a completed puzzle. You have every attribute needed to be optimist, loving, caring, trusting, happy, and confident. Your self-esteem is usually high, because no one has come along and attempted to ruin it yet. You’re optimistic, because no one is or should be shooting down your dreams. You’re caring and loving, because those were natural characteristics you were born with. You tend to be happy because you don’t have much stress. You’re happy because no one has told you that being happy all the time makes you weird, odd, or less human. Of course there are some exceptions. You have all the puzzle pieces at this stage of your life. You are a completed puzzles.

A puzzle board’s pieces are easy to disorganize. You just take apart the puzzle and scatter all of the pieces around. It’s a very quick process. Unlike a puzzle board, us human beings tend to lose pieces as time goes on. Just think about how similar your pre-dating years were to your early childhood stage. You were that completed puzzle. Chances are, you were optimistic, loving, caring, trusting, happy, and confident. Even if you weren’t happy, you probably were excited about the possibilities with dating.

Every person you involved yourself with or dated has taken at least one of your puzzle pieces with them. There’s a high possibility you’ve taken pieces of their puzzle as well. Baggage and experiences are the puzzle pieces. Those puzzle pieces complete you as a partner. Every piece of relationship baggage you own is due to at least one of your puzzle pieces being stripped away. When I hear people speak of their mate and state their mate completes them, the first thing I think of is the puzzle. Some people may think, “No one should complete you.” Those people may have a different ideology in regards to what it means to have someone complete you. I apply this same puzzle concept to it. It doesn’t mean you’re nothing without that person in your life. It simply means you’re much better with that person in your life.

Maybe their mate has helped restore their trust, after the pieces of their trust were snatched away. Being able to trust could have been one of the missing pieces they needed to be a complete and successful mate in a relationship. Maybe their mate restored their ability to love freely or be optimistic about relationships or an entire gender. Maybe their mate taught them how to be confident in everything they do. We don’t know, because more than likely we’re on the outside of their relationship looking in.

I feel the more we find our missing puzzle pieces that we lost, the closer we get to being a completed puzzle again, similar to your pre-dating stage. Sometimes you’ll meet someone who gives you a couple of missing pieces, but also takes away more pieces. Some people meet someone with all of the missing pieces and push them away. Hopefully one day you meet someone who helps you find all of the missing pieces.

Some people may be reading this and think, “Why can’t you just find your own pieces and put them back together yourself?” I’m sure you can. However, sometimes people need assistance with seeing and realizing some things they can’t see. At times, we all need an outside source to give us validation and confirmation in regards to some things.

Maybe you’ll meet someone who will help you recover your missing pieces. If not, hopefully you’ll recover all of your pieces in the near future.







Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s