You get what you don’t ask for (Story)

Posted: July 23, 2011 by Nell in Dating, Humor, Personal, Self Help/ Motivation
Tags: , , , , ,

There once was a man who consistently pursued perfection. Although he never achieved perfection, he aimed for it.  He graduated with Magna cum laude honors from his University. He had a great career as an agent for top entertainers and lived a luxurious lifestyle consisting of beautiful women, custom-made clothing, and high-end vehicles, which were all rewards from his hard work as an agent. He had an income in the upper six figure range. He was single, no kids, lived on his own and although he had no kids, he was a family man and would often let his niece and nephew visit every other weekend. He was neat and well-kept, barely letting hair grow on his face or the top of his head. He worked out 5 days a week, ate healthy, and traveled often. His hobbies were acquiring top clients in the Sports and movie industries along with playing pickup games of Basketball and flag football with his friends whenever he had free time.

While his career and lifestyle were balanced, there was a vacancy in his love life. While in highschool and college, he dated women from time to time, nothing serious. The most that ever came out of those relationships were sex. He was always referred to as being “The Pimp” by those who knew him well. While he was no real pimp, they considered him to be one because of his charismatic demeanor with the ladies. Women loved him and desired to be in his presence whenever  he had spare time. He was very confident in everything he did, but he was not arrogant. After years of being considered “The Pimp,” he desired a long-term relationship since he had become jaded with the lifestyle of being with multiple women from time to time. 

He wanted a life partner, but standing in the way of one was his desire for perfection in a mate. He wanted a woman who looked flawless like the women in Men’s lifestyle magazines and television. Her were to consist of an athletic shape with a six-pack, a decent height, perfect white teeth, long brown hair, nice skin with blemishes, pretty feet, nice legs, nice arms, and intelligent like him with no kids.

He started an online profile on the dating website “E Harmony.” He wanted to try something new and didn’t feel the urge to go out to local events and lounges to meet the type of woman that he desired.  Three weeks after starting his profile he found a woman who fit the description of the long-term mate that he desired. She was 5’6″, nice brown skin without blemishes, long hair, athletic body with a six-pack, nice arms and legs, and also nice white teeth with no kids. The two went out on a date together and their pursuit of each other abruptly came to an end.

The day after, he called his friend and told him that he’s giving up on dating for good. His friend asked him what happened to the girl that he met on E Harmony. He replied “She was everything that I thought I desired. She was beautiful, perfect shape, intelligent, and had a perfect smile.” His friend replied “Well why are you done with dating if she was that hot?” He then replied to his friend in a somber tone “While she had all of the qualities that I desire, she also has A LOT of characteristics that I don’t desire. Sure she had a perfect body, but she was loud and annoying. She had perfect brown-skinned, pretty white teeth, and nice long hair, but she was arrogant. She was intelligent, but she had no job and still lived with her parents. Her dating profile said that she was a realtor, but she stated that she hasn’t started yet. She has no desire to go back to school or get a job, because she believes that she’s too intelligent for school and doesn’t want a boss telling her what to do. I asked her what are her goals for the future and she stated that she can’t see the future. She displayed no class, she was talking with a mouth full of food. She burped OFTEN. She had bad breath and while she had no kids, her attitude was completely negative. I told her that we shouldn’t pursue each other anymore. She then told me that I wasn’t strong enough to handle a woman like her. Man she was the complete opposite of what I expected.” His friend began to laugh and asked him was it that bad. He replied “Man she was everything that I didn’t ask for.” He then shared a laugh with his friend in disbelief.

The moral of that little short story is that sometimes you get what you don’t ask for. People are so focused on looking for what they desire in a mate that they sometimes forget to think about the small but important characteristics. I believe in energy, positive and negative. I believe if you focus on and pursue the things that you desire, sooner than later you will come across them. I remember one time I was looking for a vehicle. My two desired vehicles were always a Range Rover and  BMW. One day I went on the website for the local paper to look up prices for used vehicles. Ironically I came across a Range Rover and BMW that were in my price range. Photos of the vehicles were not included in the ad, but I still took down the number for the owner of both since they were the vehicles that I desired. I was so excited thinking“Wow, who would have thought that my two desired vehicles would be in my price range. What are the chances of that?” I went to see the BMW first. While the BMW looked nice on the exterior, the interior had no backseat, the front seats had holes in them and the car didn’t start-up, although the owner claimed that it was running just before I arrived. I quickly crossed that car off the list. The next day, I went to see the Ranger Rover. The Ranger Rover had four flat tires and the interior was bad. I crossed the Range off of my list as well. I sat backed and laughed thinking “I had the opportunity to get at least one of the cars that I’ve always desired having, but I was so focused on having the specific vehicle that it didn’t cross my mind that I wanted those vehicles to be in mint condition.” I expected those vehicles to be in Mint condition. One thing I quickly learned about life is that you don’t always get what you expect.  I still think about that till this day. It’s actually one of the reasons why I believe in the laws of attraction. You do attract what you desire, but sometimes you also attract what you don’t ask for along with it.

The lesson is to be specific with what you desire. If you have a specific type of mate that you desire, make sure you specific with details when describing them in your prayers or your mind. Sometimes you do get what you don’t ask for.



The story above is fiction and the model featured is not the woman that is being discussed in the story.

  1. Marsha says:

    Hey I like the way you put the story together. Great job

  2. Anonymous says:

    This is defintiely valid. As Ive gotten older, Ive learned to be more specific about the things I dont want in a mate and be more open about the not so important details.


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