Battling Highs and Lows while Chasing Success

Posted: May 6, 2010 by Nell in Business/ Economy, Personal, Self Help/ Motivation
Tags: , , , , ,

I decided that I am going to take the blog in a different route for this post. The blogs about relationships are cool because they receive the most buzz, but this topic is more important in my opinion. One day I was having a conversation about the ups and downs that come in life while you’re trying to find yourself and stability. Sometimes, life throws you curve balls that you’re not ready for. Sometimes life throws you the same pitch over and over again, but yet you just can’t seem to catch it and hit the ball. The frustration that often comes from trying to hit the ball that has been pitched to you over and over again creates a sense of failure. That failure often leads to feeling depression. I’m not a shrink and I’m not an expert. However, once again I am speaking to you on an ordinary human being level.

I’m taking my blog in this direction for this post only because I know a couple of people who currently suffer from this. They’re not clinically depressed, but they are experiencing lows as a result of a lack of stability. I have fought the battle of highs and lows countless amounts of times, and I believe a plethora of human beings have as well whether they admit it vocally or not. Some people need medications, drugs, and alcohol that provide instant gratification in order to balance it out.

Battling Highs and Lows while chasing success

Knowledge is a tool and there are some people who feel depressed because they don’t know the cause of their sadness. They were not taught that highs and lows are a part of life. The doctors will state that you’re depressed or your brain is not functioning right if you’re experiencing highs and lows, but a large amount of people experience them, they just don’t admit it openly. One of the major reasons why some people feel depressed is because they feel like they’re the only person on earth who is going through their current situation. But the more they gain knowledge about highs and lows, and realize that they are common, they might come to a realization that they’re not depressed; instead they’re just experiencing life.

The issue is how do you handle those highs and lows? You can either look at those highs and lows as reality by realizing that the lows are a part of life, and they’re not as bad as they seem, or that those lows are a signal that something is wrong. We are supposed to be happy all the time right? No! Complete happiness is something that you acquire, it’s not natural. But I am going to state some things that may help you or someone who you know.

I notice, people are always saying things like If you’re feeling down, you’re depressed. That’s a lie! If you’re feeling down everyday all day, then yes something may be wrong. But highs and lows are a part of life, and in reference to chasing success, the highs and lows happen often. A great amount of our sadness and frustrations in life stems from things not going exactly the way that we want them to go. When things don’t go our way in life it has an effect on us, whether large or small. I had conversations in the past with some people who were experiencing depression as a result of not being where they wanted to be in their lives, and they would often talk about things that they wanted but didn’t have. They stated that they lost the desire to pursue their goals as a result of their failures when trying to accomplish them. Me personally, I experienced the same thing as well in the past. The emotion of trying to accomplish great things in life will either carry you or bury you. Some days it feels like you’re on course because everything is clicking right, and some days your off course as a result of things not going your way. In other words, when you’re on, you’re on, and when you’re off you’re off.

What I came to realize is that ups and downs, and feeling happy and sad/frustrated some days are all part of life. If you were happy every day of your life, how would you know how it feels to be sad? Actually, I don’t believe that you can experience what happiness feels like until you experience what feeling sad and frustrated feels like. The same thing applies for being sad. You won’t know what feeling sad feels like if you never experienced happiness. I know some people who are happy everyday of their lives minus the happy pills; at least they present their selves that way. They’re not happy because of their money, career, or lifestyle. They all state that they are happy because they have found inner peace. If you were to ask any of those people have they ever been sad before, all of them will say “Yes.”

One of the greatest causes of experiencing highs and lows minus your brain being off is having a desire to make something out of your life. In order to feel frustrated, you have to want something. I will state it again, IN ORDER TO FEEL FRUSTRATED, YOU HAVE TO WANT SOMETHING. People may contest that statement, but it’s very accurate. When there are people who are constantly flaunting the things that you desire in your face, whether it’s in the public, on the internet or on television, it can affect your happiness and outlook on life. There was a recent study that stated that this current generation of kids are experiencing depression more than any other previous generation. I believe that a great amount of their depression stems from the flaunting of things that they desire being presented right before their eyes, whether it’s on the net, at school, in the neighborhood, or on television. It creates a feeling that they are not good enough. Since they experience the feeling of not being good enough, they get down on their selves. Most of you are aware that constantly getting down on yourself creates a feeling of low that feels permanent.

One of the mistakes that we make as humans is measuring our happiness against other’s happiness. What makes Lebron James happy may not make you happy. The two of you can be in the same positions in your careers, and have the same contract, same house, same vehicles, and same status, and you may not be as happy as Lebron is. The reason why is because you and Lebron do not share the exact past. Sure you two may have come from similar environments, both have single mothers, and both were raised in the same circumstances. However, Lebron James’ happiness may actually stem from the effect and influence that he has on others, while your’s may be only because of the status and money.

While I’m guilty of it too, I dislike hearing people say things like “Man if I had Jay-Z’s status and money, I would be the happiest person in the world.” How do you know? I can almost guarantee you that if you do not find the remedy of balancing highs and lows before you get Jay-Z’s status and money, you will be on a fast crash course for depression and frustration. Being in business, I have experienced so many ups and downs. One thing that most people in business are aware of is that there are always going to be highs and lows. You may gain one million dollars one week and lose half of it the next. It comes with the territory of trying and attempting to live out your dreams. We all desire things and have dreams, but the highs and lows that come along on that journey are the same highs and lows that make people quit. Once you realize that those highs and lows are natural, it will make it easier to keep striving. I’m embracing it everyday, and I realize that chasing wealth and success has its highs and lows, but you’re already defeating a feeling of depression and frustration that stems from this by realizing the highs and lows come with the territory. No one is immune to it, some just learn how to handle it better than others.

Darnell R. Mckinnon

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  1. Keshia Johnson says:

    “In order to feel frustrated you have to want something”….Ilike this quote it is very personal to me. I can completely agree with this blog Darnell. I am in the process of tryin to start my own business and when I look at where I want to be and where I am currently I get frustrated bc it just seems so far away. But you are right life and business def. has its share of ups and dwn. and if you want to succeed you need to learn how to roll with the punches.

  2. Stacy says:

    Good job. Could you further explain to me what are some ways that I can get through this? I’m going through this right now. Thanx!

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