Good Enough to Sleep With, But Not Good Enough to Be With

What’s up people?  I know it seems like forever since I last blogged. I decided to drop a blog on Super Bowl Sunday. My team isn’t in the Super Bowl and I’m a little up in the air about who I want to cheer for. One side says 49ers because I’m a fan of a couple of their players and my other side says Ravens because I would like to see Ray Lewis go out on top. Either way I just want to see a good competitive game, which I’m sure it will be. I decided to write this post because I wanted to talk about my stance on the subject above. This blog post is for both men and women.

Good Enough to Sleep With, But Not Good Enough to Be With

I’m not hinting you shouldn’t have sex with people who you’re not in a relationship with. This post is about sleeping with someone who you can’t even see yourself being in a relationship with. Maybe its just me, but it seems as if a lot of people make relationship/dating decisions based on present thinking with the future being out of mind. They view sex as just being something casual. However, there are a lot of future dilemmas that can occur for both males and females as a result of sexual activity.  The way sex is discussed in music, television, social networks, and in general proves that most people view it as a casual activity. Of course there are pros and cons that can come out of almost every situation, but I believe for a lot of people sex is an instinctive action instead of a rational one. Every sexual partner that you choose to get involved with has the potential to change your life and put in a direction you didn’t intend on it going.

I chose the title Good enough to sleep with, but not good enough to be with from a conversation I had the other day. I came to the realization that a lot of people view sex as a casual act. But in hindsight a lot of those same people also regret that casual act. The people who read my post are adults for the most part so I’m sure you’re aware of pregnancy, STD, and emotional baggage that can come from casual sex. As a man, a lot of people believe we lack the ability to think rational when it comes to sex. They believe “all men are dogs” and we think with our head between our legs and not the one on our shoulders. However, as a man who thinks with the head on his shoulders I would have to disagree. Every man on earth does not sleep with every woman who shows him interest. Some men are better than that. The same goes for women.

There are a lot of people who get involved with people who are good enough to sleep with, but are not good enough to be in a relationship with. Some of those people have the ability to think rational and are aware of the potential outcomes of sleeping with someone who they can’t see themselves being in a relationship with. But a lot of those people think on instinct and don’t analyze potential future outcomes. One night stands are an example of an instinctive sexual act. A one night stand isn’t the result of a date; it’s strictly instinctive. Sure you may go out planning on finding someone to screw, but majority of the time you don’t have a clue of who that person is until you actually engage in communication which leads to the act. Instinctive acts go deeper than one night stands. Sleeping with someone strictly based on being drunk, high, or horny are all instinctive.

The risks of sleeping with someone who you wouldn’t consider dating outweigh the rewards in most cases. If pregnancy happens as a result, you end up sharing a baby with a man or woman who you can’t see yourself being with outside of sex. If a STD happens, you end up with a disease which was given to you by someone who’s not even worthy of being your mate. Think about that. If emotional baggage happens, you end up being emotionally attached to an action or someone you know you will never be in a relationship with. There are a lot of unwanted pregnancies and people with emotional baggage which were a result of sleeping with someone they could not see themselves involved with.

Some people may be reading this and think “well you can get pregnant, an STD, or emotional baggage from someone you’re in a relationship with.” That’s true, however since you’re in a relationship with that person you have made more of an investment in that person and more than likely your act which caused those issues above were as a result of rational thinking and not instinctive.You also will probably be able to handle something such as pregnancy better with someone you’re in a relationship with than someone you’re just casually sleeping with. Contraception is not 100% effective so its better to take a risk than someone who you’re invested in and involved with than someone who you’re not invested in and have no interest in being with. Think about it. Why add that extra strain to your life?

Darnell R. McKinnon

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